Have you ever broken your leg? Think about it for a moment. Perhaps you were skiing or jumping off of something.... or perhaps you just fell down some stairs. You feel that sharp pain shoot through your leg. Perhaps a tear comes to your eyes because the pain is intense. You are hurt. There’s no doubt about that. Now what?
First thing most people do when they break a leg is to immobilize it. This prevents additional injury. Next, you go see a doctor. The doctor will apply a cast and recommend crutches (or some form of mobility aid). In severe cases, the doctor may also prescribe a painkiller. All of this happens with the hope that over time, you will heal and return to as close to normal as possible.
Now, think about those who have been hurt emotionally and spiritually. The deeper the break, the greater the pain and longer the recovery. I remember when I broke my leg, I spent a lot of time sitting or reclined. I couldn’t join in at karate classes or ride my bicycle. The pain was too great. My life revolved around minimizing pain for a period of time. When hurt spiritually, a person may need time to recover. Time to sort out the pains in their heart. Time to begin the healing process. Like a leg, putting them back into action (ministry) right away may cause additional breaks and further pain. The initial period of time is needed to prevent additional injury while in a weakened state. Keep in mind that having family around you helps in this time of recovery. They can do things to help, whether it be encouragement or more practical things. Either way, being alone and injured is a bad idea. So should it be when injured by a spiritual leader. Your family can help you recover. Your friends can be there for you. Surrounding yourself with healthy people who are willing and able can get you back on track with your life.
But, what is a healthy person? None of my friends or family kicked my leg and told me that I was faking it. They never said I was wrong and had no reason to act as if I was in pain. Instead, they brought comfort as needed. They never pushed me over to watch me try to get back up. It was all about the healing. The same is true with people who have spiritual wounds. They need to be validated. This person REALLY went through an ordeal. Their heart is broken and their spirit crushed. They are now seeking to recover. Regardless of what you think you know, you must never rebuke them or treat them different for feeling wronged.
Like breaking your leg, a person who has been spiritually wronged may need support. I used crutches for a while. There may be a person or two that this person may lean on especially. Someone to hold them up as they are regaining their strength. Someone to help them keep moving in the right direction. Someone to help keep their footing sure. The goal here is to aid recovery by reducing stress in the area that has been injured.
As the person recovers, they may seek a pain killer. I know I did for a few days after the break. Pain killers are never meant to be long term and are often optional. Still, I wouldn’t look down at a person who looks to something else to cope with the pain in their life. The truth is that people naturally flee from pain. In the case of being hurt, you should never use painkillers as a long term solution. Ultimately, they end up as an addiction. Think about the many celebrities that become addicted to drugs like morphine to deal with their day. At this point, the injured person replaces one problem with another. The healthy way is to minimize lifestyle changes (whether drinking, smoking, or other comforting actions). The goal is recovery, not to delve deeper into something harmful.
At some point in all of this, the cast needs to come off. At this point, the bone is healed and the person should be mobile. When spiritually hurt, you should start getting back into ministry as opposed to sitting on the sidelines. You ministered before you were hurt and should be strong by this time to get back into it. You should be ready to do whatever it is that God has put on your heart to do. Like when I broke my leg, I started out slow in karate. I was easy on the kicks. As I gained more and more strength, I eventually kicked harder with my injured leg than I did with the uninjured one.
My purpose in writing this is to emphasize a few key points.
As with my leg, I walk different since the break. My leg will never be the same. I won’t expect the same from a person who has been hurt spiritually. Their heart has suffered a pain that God will use to strengthen them. All healing comes from God. To omit God from the healing process is to stay injured.
I offer encouragement to those out there who have been hurt. You will recover. The how and how long are up to you.
First thing most people do when they break a leg is to immobilize it. This prevents additional injury. Next, you go see a doctor. The doctor will apply a cast and recommend crutches (or some form of mobility aid). In severe cases, the doctor may also prescribe a painkiller. All of this happens with the hope that over time, you will heal and return to as close to normal as possible.
Now, think about those who have been hurt emotionally and spiritually. The deeper the break, the greater the pain and longer the recovery. I remember when I broke my leg, I spent a lot of time sitting or reclined. I couldn’t join in at karate classes or ride my bicycle. The pain was too great. My life revolved around minimizing pain for a period of time. When hurt spiritually, a person may need time to recover. Time to sort out the pains in their heart. Time to begin the healing process. Like a leg, putting them back into action (ministry) right away may cause additional breaks and further pain. The initial period of time is needed to prevent additional injury while in a weakened state. Keep in mind that having family around you helps in this time of recovery. They can do things to help, whether it be encouragement or more practical things. Either way, being alone and injured is a bad idea. So should it be when injured by a spiritual leader. Your family can help you recover. Your friends can be there for you. Surrounding yourself with healthy people who are willing and able can get you back on track with your life.
But, what is a healthy person? None of my friends or family kicked my leg and told me that I was faking it. They never said I was wrong and had no reason to act as if I was in pain. Instead, they brought comfort as needed. They never pushed me over to watch me try to get back up. It was all about the healing. The same is true with people who have spiritual wounds. They need to be validated. This person REALLY went through an ordeal. Their heart is broken and their spirit crushed. They are now seeking to recover. Regardless of what you think you know, you must never rebuke them or treat them different for feeling wronged.
Like breaking your leg, a person who has been spiritually wronged may need support. I used crutches for a while. There may be a person or two that this person may lean on especially. Someone to hold them up as they are regaining their strength. Someone to help them keep moving in the right direction. Someone to help keep their footing sure. The goal here is to aid recovery by reducing stress in the area that has been injured.
As the person recovers, they may seek a pain killer. I know I did for a few days after the break. Pain killers are never meant to be long term and are often optional. Still, I wouldn’t look down at a person who looks to something else to cope with the pain in their life. The truth is that people naturally flee from pain. In the case of being hurt, you should never use painkillers as a long term solution. Ultimately, they end up as an addiction. Think about the many celebrities that become addicted to drugs like morphine to deal with their day. At this point, the injured person replaces one problem with another. The healthy way is to minimize lifestyle changes (whether drinking, smoking, or other comforting actions). The goal is recovery, not to delve deeper into something harmful.
At some point in all of this, the cast needs to come off. At this point, the bone is healed and the person should be mobile. When spiritually hurt, you should start getting back into ministry as opposed to sitting on the sidelines. You ministered before you were hurt and should be strong by this time to get back into it. You should be ready to do whatever it is that God has put on your heart to do. Like when I broke my leg, I started out slow in karate. I was easy on the kicks. As I gained more and more strength, I eventually kicked harder with my injured leg than I did with the uninjured one.
My purpose in writing this is to emphasize a few key points.
- Some people have been severely broken by spiritual leadership and deserve to be validated and shown mercy.
- Spiritual healing is a process that takes time.
- The goal is always recovery, not to remain immobilized.
As with my leg, I walk different since the break. My leg will never be the same. I won’t expect the same from a person who has been hurt spiritually. Their heart has suffered a pain that God will use to strengthen them. All healing comes from God. To omit God from the healing process is to stay injured.
I offer encouragement to those out there who have been hurt. You will recover. The how and how long are up to you.
